Sabotage

Day 2

Dear Diet Diary, 

This day.... 

Breakfast:

• Plain oatmeal with honey: I got up late but decided to eat this while still at home. This was a mistake. As I said yesterday, I don't do so well eating really early in the morning. I bought plain, original oatmeal to save the calories and sugar intake and thought I could spice it up with some local honey. It wasn't good. I ended up force feeding myself. This is probably not what you're supposed to do. And the saddest part-I know that I will eat it again tomorrow. 
• Banana: today was the best day for this banana. Not too green, not squishy yet. Just perfect.SKINNY mocha: Once again I paid for the steamed water. It still tasted bad and I still sipped slowly, listening to everyone order their drinks with the fat. I was jealous and judgmental at the same time. I hate this skinny mocha. 

When I walked into the Hawley's home they were having a breakfast like I've never seen before. Sausage, bacon, waffles with huckleberry syrup, eggs, whole milk, and coffee. They hate me. They were like, "look at all this good we have left!...Oh I'm so full...Goodness, this was good..." I dreamed of what it would be like to flip the table. Alas, it's too heavy though. 

Ben's grandmother began cleaning the table and so I sat down, comfortable now that the food was leaving. However, this was left sitting in front of me. 

A plate of sausage. I now know they are trying to sabotage me. 

Lunch:

• 1 cup Honey Nut Cheerios with half a cup 1% milk. I still have no idea if this is a good diet food. My stomach still says no. Ben used his own spoon to eat my cereal during lunch. He had sweet potato tater tots, a meatball and Mac-n-cheese. A feast. It took everything in me not to knock him off his chair. 
• 1 cup of carrots with 2 Tbsp of hummus. 

As we are lunch Ben asked if we could go to Barnes & Noble after nap to get dessert. He reminded me, "Sissa, you can get a cheesecake." Yes, Ben, thank you for the reminder that I can't eat cheesecake right now when that's all I want to do. Sabotage from a 3 year old. 
But because that guy has totally got me, I agreed to take him to Barnes & Noble and he ate his shortbread cookies and drank his apple juice, I just sat and stared. It was a sweet time of conversation until I looked down and read this:

Why do they hate me? Of course I want to take advantage of this deal, B&N. And this dark chocolate raspberry is exactly what I want!! Just like you wanted all your bake cases busted. How do you like glass all over the floor after I threw a chair through? Not so fun, huh. Sabotage.
After Ben and I returned for B&N, his grandmother was on the phone asking her boyfriend if he was going to eat Spaghetti. I'm so glad that I ate such a good filling lunch because the mention of something like spaghetti could really make me sad if I hadn't. The cereal and carrots really hit the spot.
Said no one ever. Well done, Taytah. Sabotage.


Dinner:

• Japonessa. Japonessa is an amazing sushi restuarant downtown and we hit Happy Hour tonight as to say goodbye to Halie who heads back to Alabama on Sunday morning. I definitely cheated on this diet. Lets just leave it at that.  I allowed myself a glass of wine with dinner and had lots of stuff that I shouldn't. But Halie is leaving for Alabama on Sunday...how could I not eat myself into a mild depression on this night. 

Snacks:

• Apple. It makes me livid to think of the amount of mealy apples I've eaten this week. LIVID. Am I incapable of choosing a good apple?! I'm sure its Thriftway, they did this to me on purpose. Once again, sabotage. 
• Carrots, again. I actually forgot to take an afternoon snack so I had to snack on carrots again. Its time to make a grocery run. 

Drinks:

• Water. Today I managed to drink 3 full water bottles.  I have no idea how many ounces that is, I should figure it out. And I had 2 glasses of water with dinner so hopefully I am on the right track. 
• Glass of red wine at Japonessa. 
• Rum and Coke at The Little Red Hen. This is the exact type of drink that I was told to stay away from but I got it anyway. SHAME. It was crazy sweet and I wasn't really in the mood for it. Kind of a waste of calories. 

Well, I guess that's it. It's crazy late here and I feel myself getting delirious. 

So, 6 weeks and 2 days...